The other day my friend who has a toddler and a baby Isaac’s age e-mailed me for suggestions on how to get her baby to sleep better. I have been thinking for a while now that I should share our “tricks” to getting our babies to sleep on the blog, especially our swaddling technique, which is rather uncommon. So, instead of re-writing what I wrote to her, I will just post part of the e-mail I sent her, and add a few photos. Hopefully this can be as helpful for you as it has been for us:
I am not the type of mom who cancels activities for kids' sleep schedules -- I do try to plan doctors' appointments so they don't fall right after lunchtime (when my kids take their daily nap), but I won't stay home from something because my kids will miss their nap or get to bed really late at night, and I know that doesn't work for lots of other people. Also, when the kids are babies (like with Isaac now) I don't have them on a certain sleep schedule during the day. When they are happy, I let them lay on the floor, sit in a swing, jump in a jumper, or hold them, and if they get fussy and they're not messy or hungry, I try to put them to sleep -- no matter what time it is. And they may not sleep at a regular time during the day, but as long as they sleep through the night (and sometimes during the day) I'm ok with that. The other thing I do with Isaac is try to feed him every 4 hours in the daytime, not at certain times of the day. So, if he wakes up at 7am and he takes a bottle, then I'll give him another one at 11am, then if he happens to be asleep at 3pm I'll wait until he wakes up to feed him (I NEVER wake up a sleeping baby [unless the baby is underweight or has some health issues and needs to be fed on a schedule in order to gain weight]). So, then if he were to eat at 3:30, and then at 7:30 he is acting happy and not hungry yet, I will wait until he acts hungry and give him a bottle then. That works better for me, because I'm not trying to make him eat or sleep when he doesn't want to, and if he takes a longer/shorter nap than usual it doesn't throw off the whole schedule.
So, here are some things that we do that I think really help with the sleeping -- you may have tried some of them already, but this has worked for us. We swaddle our babies. All of our boys have been swaddled, and it has helped them hold still so they can sleep longer. And then when Camden was a baby my friend showed us another way to swaddle that we'd never seen before, and I love it so much that I show all the parents/potential future parents that I can. We call it double swaddling. I will post pictures with this description of the swaddling, because it is kind of hard to understand if you can’t see it (thank you, Kolby, for taking many of these pictures for me – this is the first time I’ve let Kolby use our digital camera). So, basically I take two blankets -- usually lightweight cotton blankets, and it is easier if they are square. I've looked around a lot, and the best ones I've found are at Wal Mart (or at least they were there when Isaac was born), they come in packs of four and are rather cute designs/colors. They are 40x40 inches (rather than the more common 30x30 or 30x40 inch ones I find most places). The 40x40 is the perfect size for a little baby, and now that Isaac's getting a little bigger a 50x50 or even 60x60 inch blanket would be nice, but you might have to make them. And they need to be thin, or they will be way too bulky once you get them all wrapped up.
So, I lay out one blanket with a corner pointing up, and fold that top corner over, then I lay the second blanket on top of the first, folding the top corner over on that one too. Then I lay the baby down with his head off the blanket at the top where it has been folded down. I take the top blanket on the left and wrap it over his left arm, then lift him up by his legs and wrap it under his back, then do this on the right too. Then I use the bottom blanket to swaddle like normal -- wrap over the left side, up over the feet, and then over the right side. I swear this technique adds an extra few hours of sleep because they can't get out and whack themselves I the face as they flail their arms about -- Isaac has only gotten out of this swaddle a handful of times, and that's usually when we are lazy and don't wrap him very snuggly. I know people who think our kids would be too old for swaddling, but why stop something that works so well? I continue to swaddle as long as I can keep them in the blankets, and once they grow out of it I have never had a problem with the baby transitioning to sleeping without being swaddled. I swaddle him to sleep every night, and off and on through the day to nap. One thing I have noticed, though, is that since I've done this type of swaddling with my last two boys, they seem not to roll over, crawl, or walk quite as early as the other two did, but not really delayed -- like Camden walked at almost 12 months as compared to Kolby walking at 10 months and Eli at 9 months, but I don't know if that's just the different kids or if it has to do with being swaddled so they don't do as much tummy time or rolling over as early on. But either way, they haven't been delayed later than the norm.
The other sleeping aid that I swear by is our swing. We were given a Fisher Price Aquarium Swing (it has a fish design on it, and fish hang from the mobile) when Kolby was born, and we use it so much that we are now on our second one with baby number 4. It is the kind of swing that goes from side to side or can be turned to swing from front to back (my kids have all preferred side to side, although sometimes it does calm them down to switch the direction of the swinging if they get fussy and change things up a bit, although Isaac has only ever swung side to side). I think the type of swing is key -- we have visited family several times and they have borrowed normal swings, and I don't like them at all (they do sleep better in those than just in a crib, but not nearly as well in a side-swinging swing). The old ones just swing front to back, they usually sit up pretty straight, so they can't lie back at all (which really doesn't work for newborns), and some old swings have to be wound up, which would not be nice to deal with. Our swing goes through batteries every couple of weeks or so, but our sleep is worth that to us. And they aren't too expensive -- I think this swing was around $99 new, but that was almost 5 years ago, and I got our second one at a garage sale for $30. I saw one that looked brand new the other day for around $60 at the Once Upon A Child store near our house, over by Kohls on 124th Street. Anyways, our kids sleep in the swing all night long, and nap in it during the day. I swaddle Isaac and then lay him in the swing (this works because the seat reclines enough so they are more laying than sitting). And I don't worry about buckling him in yet, because he never gets out of his swaddling, so he's not going anywhere. And again, I haven't had problems with our kids transitioning to sleeping in a crib later on, when they grow out of the swing/swaddling. My kids stay in the swing for months -- which also saves room because the swing takes up a lot less room than a crib. The only problem is when going for extended stays to family when they are still babies and used to sleeping in the swing, it is hard to get them to sleep as well without a swing, and can be difficult to find a side swinging swing to borrow while out of town.
Our kids also use pacifiers. Isaac mostly uses his now to fall asleep -- he doesn't keep it in his mouth well, and we hold it in while we put him to sleep, then it always falls out while he is sleeping. Sometimes, if he is in the swing, swaddled, trying to fall asleep, but I don't want to sit there holding his pacifier in, I take a flap of his swaddling blankets, a burp clothe, or another small blanket, and bunch it up behind the pacifier so it can stay in place until he falls asleep all the way. He uses a Soothie, just because that's what they gave him in the NICU. The other boys used ones from the grocery store, and Kolby never really took one at all.
I think those are about all of our sleeping "tricks." Oh, and I guess I should mention how we actually get Isaac to sleep. If he doesn't happen to fall asleep on his own, and we know he's tired and ready to go down, we check his diaper, swaddle him nice and tight, feed him a bottle, give him his pacifier, and then if he starts to wake up a bit before we lay him down this is how I get him to fall back to sleep (and it has worked pretty well with our other boys too). I stand up and hold him almost horizontal in my arms (and since he is swaddled I don't have legs and arms moving all around), and I hold him facing me (so his pacifier stays in his mouth), and then I make little tiny jiggling movements, kind of like jello. I know that's a weird way to describe it, but that's what it makes me think of. He usually can't last too long awake when I do that. If we really starts to wake up and starts fussing, I make loud shushing noises close to his ear (I guess that's more for a little baby, but I still do it).
Also, if you haven't read The Happiest Baby on the Block, I would recommend it. Lots of the things I do are covered in that book. (Although the author gives some pretty ridiculous reasons for why he thinks his suggestions work, the suggestions do work). He suggests the 5 'S's: swing, swaddle, shush, shake (jiggle), and suck. And the more of these suggestions you use all together, the better they work. I was already doing many of these things before I read the book when I was pregnant with Camden, but it gave me a few extra suggestions I hadn't been trying.
So, does anyone have in good suggestions for potty training? (Especially for helping kids that have been potty trained successfully and then regress later on?)
